I have been dealing with anxiety a lot during this season of my life. It is not constant, but regular enough that I’ll admit to it. I am not totally sure what to do with it; it’s an unfamiliar feeling for me. I don’t rattle easily. I am fairly even-keeled. Yet things have found ways to get to me recently: small things, less small things, cultural things. The fact of the matter is anxiety can suffocate hope. And I need hope. It is something that pulls me forward.
When I got home from school tonight, the house was quiet. So I poured a bowl of cereal, sat on my couch, and took a deep breath. Then I remembered this verse:
But this I call to mind, and therefore I have hope
Lamentations is a bleak book of scripture, yet that verse is a pivot. It is the storm momentarily quieting down, it’s a crack of light in a dark room. My apprehension is nowhere near the level of heartache that the prophet experiences in Lamentations. Yet that verse called out to me as I sat in my living room tonight.
But this I call to mind, and therefore I have hope:
The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases,
His mercies never come to an end;
they are new every morning;
great is Your faithfulness.
"The Lord is my portion," says my soul,
"therefore I will hope in Him."
I forget that reality sometimes. I shouldn’t, but I do. The love of God cannot be stopped. God’s mercy does not end nor does it take the day off. God is faithful.
So this I will try to remember and therefore have hope.