Did the title tip my hand too much? The near sacrifice of Isaac has always been a troubling passage for me. Now I can put on my religious studies hat and tell you that compared to some other religious stories of the day that this tale is actually kind of progressive. The religion following the God of Abraham is different from other faiths; even though it feints in that direction, this God does not require child sacrifice. This story conveys the important message (one that I wrote about just last week) about the necessity and difficulty of obedience to God above all else. It asserts that such faithfulness will be rewarded. I also know that this story was told in a context that is dramatically different from our own. It is not written for modern audiences.

But, whew, I really hate this story. I didn’t feel great about as a kid and I truly do not like it today as a father. Despite all the caveats mentioned above, I cannot read this story and not imagine how everyone involved would walk away with irreparably scarred relationships.

How could Abraham have lived with himself knowing that he was moments from killing his own son? How could Isaac—who was tied up, laid upon an altar, and watched his father grab a knife to sacrifice him—not be a complete shell of a person? How could the relationship with father and son ever be the same? And how could either of them not feel conflicted about a God who played such a seemingly cruel game with both of them?

Jun 25
Jun 25 Swords

Chris Cox

Weekly Lectionary

This is one of those texts with which people are not sure what to do. It is likely that a lot of churches will shy away from it. Or it is one that a church might triple down on and receive the wrong message (“As the army of Christ, we are at war with everyone and everything in this world!”). It’s a tough one. The text definitely has an edge as it reaches its crescendo. Jesus says that he didn’t come to bring peace. Rather he came to bring a sword that would sever the ties within one’s family. In fact, if you want to follow Jesus then you need to hate your own family.

It is one of those moments of jarring dissonance. Much of the gospel message aims to bring the Hope of God to fruition. There is a desire for justice, peace, and a love unlike that which the world has ever experienced. So when Jesus says that he came to set sons against fathers, daughters against mothers, and so on then we find ourselves clearing out our ears in hopes that we didn’t hear him correctly. It kind of seems antithetical to what he teaches. Does he really want his followers to go to war with their families?

I am writing this as I sit at my parents’ kitchen table in South Carolina. I am fortunate that I have parents who have been there for me from the beginning and are still here for me now. Yesterday at breakfast, Mom asked the loaded question of how I was doing and I could answer in full honesty because I knew she truly wanted to know and I had no fear that my response would not scare her off. I do not know where I would be without these two loving people.

So does Jesus want me to hate them? No, of course not.

Jun 18
Jun 18 bwahaha

Chris Cox

Weekly Lectionary

The old saying goes that if you want to make God laugh, tell God about your plans. Apparently the reverse is true: if God wants to make us laugh, then telling us the plan is the way to go. That is the story here. Three mysterious visitors visit Abraham and Sarah and tell them that the very, very, very old couple is going to have a baby. Sarah overhears this ludicrous plan and laughs.

Yet God gets the last laugh. Sarah has a baby and they name him Isaac which means, “One who laughs or rejoices.” The skeptical chuckle at the seemingly outlandish turned into the giddy laughter of “How the heck did we get so lucky?” It is two people cracking up because things are ridiculously wonderful.

There is not much profound to add to the story except that I wish that we found more opportunities for laughter within the church. There are different ways that we experience the love and grace of God, but one of the ways is an unbridled joy that often does not get expressed in church. Come to think of it, that kind of joy does not often get expressed in our culture generally.

Jun 11
Jun 11 Leaps of Faith: Leave it Behind

Chris Cox

Weekly Lectionary

“Follow me.”

It seems really, really simple. In some ways it is. One of the lyrics that feels like it came preloaded in my memory is “I have decided to follow Jesus / I have decided to follow Jesus / I have decided to follow Jesus / No turning back / No turning back.” As a kid, following Jesus felt simple because the world is a lot less complicated. Do you believe Jesus is the Son of God? Do you feel sorry for the wrong you’ve done and want to try to do what’s right? Then let’s go.

And even all these years later? Some days, it still feels kind of simple. Not simple as in easy but simple as in I still think Jesus is the best way we can encounter God, I am sorry for the wrong I have done, and I do want to try to do what’s right. Sign me up. Let’s go.

Yet other days I am reminded that biblically speaking, this whole “Follow me” business requires more than sign me up and let’s go.

Jun 3

Jun 3 Leaps of Faith: Falling Upward

Chris Cox

If you were to ask me the question of what is my favorite movie, I would not be able to give you a straight answer. There are so many movies that I love and it all really depends on my mood. It could be anything from WALL-E, one of the Star Wars films, Chariots of Fire, The Truman Show, Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, or so many others. But my favorite movie scene? That one is easy.

Miles Morales has felt a sense of calling. Or rather calling in the form of genetically altered arachnid has bit him. Yet like most of us, Miles is unsure of whether or not he is worthy of that calling. Using his newfound powers, he sticks to the side of a skyscraper high above New York City. In his head, both he and we hear the counsel of his family and mentors. The last voice he hears belongs to Peter B. Parker who tells Miles that he won’t know when he is ready; it’s a leap of faith.

With that, Miles jumps. The glass where his fingers had stuck to the skyscraper shatter off the building. He begins to fall to the city below and in a gorgeously iconic shot forever associated with this film, the camera flips upside down and it looks like Miles is ascending. As the music swells, the kid from Brooklyn lets his web shooters fly and he begins to swing, flip, and leap through the streets below. The doubts and the questions fly off of him and even though he is wearing a mask, joy radiates off of him. Miles is born again and he has a new name: Spider-Man.

May 31
May 31 40

Chris Cox

I have been trying to write a post for over a week about turning forty. Yet every time I reach down the well is…not dry, but weird. I am still in this season where I feel like I am holding my emotions at arm’s length. I worry if I get sad then I won’t stop crying and if I get angry then I’ll want to burn everything down. Not really a great way to go through life! Because I would really like to move through life without flinching at myself; to own the courage that landed me in this place, to have the joy of God’s salvation restored to me.

Human beings are funny creatures in that we put far too much stock in numbers that end with fives and zeroes. As I approached 40, I thought about the other times that I entered a new decade. When I was 10, I was still a kid and that’s a pretty good gig. When I was 20, I was discovering myself in college and starting to fall in love with the woman who would become my wife. When I was 30, we had recently had our second son and I was nearing completing my M. Div. in seminary. Each milestone was a marker of progress and the border of a new frontier. At 40? Well, I’m semi-employed and staring down a chasm of uncertainty deeper and darker than any I’ve encountered in my adult life.

Bible nerd that I am, I have been preoccupied with the Fortieth Psalm for some time. “I waited patiently for the Lord; He inclined to me and heard my cry. He drew me up from the desolate pit, out of the miry bog, and set my feet upon a rock, making my steps secure.” There is a hope there that resonates deep within me. Of course then I also hear Bono plaintively wail “How long to sing this song?” and I wonder that too.

May 18

May 18 To Jim on his 13th Birthday

Chris Cox

How are you thirteen? Yes, as we have discussed the numerous times you have excitedly asked whether I believed you were going to be a teenager, I technically know how. I was there when you were born and that was thirteen years ago today. It’s easy to connect the dots and know how we got here. And at the same time it seems like some kind of magic that the 6 pound, 8 ounce child that I first held in my arms in that Spartanburg hospital is the young man who is falling asleep in this room tonight.

Well, not quite falling asleep. You just asked me what you could buy with the $20 Nintendo gift card you got from your aunt, uncle, and cousins.

Because as far as your interests are concerned, you have completely followed your father down the nerdy rabbit hole. For the last week, our home has been completely consumed by the newest Zelda game. The music that you selected for the ride to school this morning was the Star Wars playlist and you will just randomly say to me, “Dad, Star Wars is pretty great, isn’t it?” You have devoured virtually every one of my graphic novels that I have allowed you to read, eagerly anticipate the latest issue of World’s Finest, and are a walking encyclopedia of DC Comics minutiae. So you’re welcome. Or I’m sorry. Not sure which it is yet. In all seriousness, I love it. It is so much fun to watch your imagination soar with all of these stories that I also love.

May 4
May 4 The Star Wars Film Tiers & Other Far, Far Away Miscellany

Chris Cox

May 4th is a good day. We took a pun (“May the fourth be with you”) and created an unofficial holiday out of it. In honor of Star Wars Day, I decided to do what people on the internet love to do: make lists about completely subjective things. The main event is my Tier Ranking for Star Wars films. People will often ask me what my favorite Star Wars movie is and that is actually a difficult question to answer. Partly because my favorite can change with whichever movie I am watching and partly because only a Sith deals in absolutes. Over the years, I have organized the Skywalker Saga (plus the two Star Wars Story movies) into 5 tiers. For the first time I am publishing it so the internet can tell me I’m wrong.

Tier 1: The Best of the Best
Episode IV - A New Hope
Episode V - The Empire Strikes Back
Episode VIII - The Last Jedi

Tier 2: Great Movies That I Regularly Think Should Be in Tier 1 When I Watch Them
Rogue One
Episode VI - Return of the Jedi
Episode VII - The Force Awakens

May 3
May 3 Once more into the wilderness

Chris Cox

There has been little rhythm to my life in the last two months. No longer working at a church, there have been no liturgical or functional ecclesial patterns for me to follow. The places I would normally go and many of the people that I talked to and shared my days with have kind of evaporated from my life. There have been moments when it has been a bit unnerving and I am feeling pretty good if I keep myself under three existential crises per week.

The irony is we are in the fifth week of Easter, but I feel like I have tumbled backwards through time and am stuck in Lent. There have been a lot of ashes and dust and remembering that everything is finite and lots of things suck. Cognitively, I know about resurrection and new life, but it feels like wilderness. I am trying to figure out again where I fit in and what I am supposed to do.

I am trying to remind myself that this experience is not a sign of failure. Most of us go on these metaphorical wilderness expeditions in our lives; usually we do so many different times. I am trying to remember that I come from a family of itinerant ministers and carnies. That I follow a faith of nomads and wanderers. Heck, Jesus spent time in the wilderness and told his followers that he did not even have a place to lay his head. When the Israelites spent four decades rambling about, God stayed out in the wilderness with them in a tent.

Apr 7
Apr 7 Stories and Compassion

Chris Cox

“All that is holding us together [is] stories and compassion.”
-Anne Lamott quoting Barry Lopez, Stitches, 23

This last month has been dark for a myriad of reasons. Holding on to hope sometimes feels like trying to hang tight to a fraying rope in a monsoon. Compassion—those moments that remind me that I am not alone—will always be the act that keeps me holding on. When I talk with my wife or get a phone call from a family member or a hug from someone I run into in town, it’s a needed reminder that this too shall pass.

The inverse is also true. When you are in a troubled time and you feel alone then it seems like you will be falling in the abyss forever. Which is tough because none of us can experience that reassuring compassion all the time. Loved ones can’t check on you constantly; they work, they have lives. Friends may not know what to say. Thank God, then, for stories which are the other thing that I have found to have held me together these last few weeks.

When I was a kid, Superman comics were a refuge for me. I didn’t really fit in at school. I had friends, but there was a pervasive sense of unbelonging. It’s that not too uncommon adolescent feeling that you don’t matter. Yet when I journeyed to Metropolis via my local comic book store, I was transported to a world where good always triumphed over evil. A place where the most powerful individual was also the most humble and kind. It was a world in which the every person and even a cat up a tree mattered. I wanted that world to be true. I still want that world to be true.